Straight-lining ain’t skiing. It’s a waste of natural resources!!!

In these troubled times, skiers need to rethink their values and STOP wasting our natural resources. Straight-lining a untracked slope of pristine powder is a complete waste. It is an insult to the natural beauty of the skiing enviroment. It is a crime against the sport of skiing and riding.

Dude!

I understand that when you’ve just launched off a 893 foot cliff, the last thing on your mind is making turns. But come on. You just created a massive landing hole, so why not finish it off with a bunch of killer turns? Consider it a celebration of Dude-ism. Right on. No worries.

Straight-lining is also a sin. How can one take in the surrounding beauty when going Mach 2. That’s why God made drugs, so we feel like we’re going fast. My suggestion, take a Black Beauty or a White Cross, drink a Red Bull and make some turns. 35 miles per hour will feel like yer goin 120…